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Nurturing your marriage and keeping the intimacy alive while living apart is a real challenge that most military wives face, especially around the holiday season. It’s so important to stay connected and preserve the special bond between you and your husband.

Here are some tips on keeping the sparks alive even when you’re apart:

  • Keep a journal – either on-line or a hard copy version. Each night, write in your journal just like you would speak to your husband. Take a few minutes to record your thoughts, feelings, and ideas. Discuss the events of the day, the weather, the news, etc. Every week or so, send the pages to your husband. Have him do the same for you.
  • Be sure to let your husband know how much you love and miss him but keep in mind that he needs to know you’re e able to handle life on the home front, as hard as it may et. Try to stay upbeat and positive because your morale directly affects his.
  • Take lots of pictures and send them to your husband regularly. There are frames and photo albums that allow you to record personalized messages.
  • Make countdown calendars – one for you and one for him. Use an index card for each day. On each card, write the date, how many days until he’ll be home, a reason why you love him and something you will do together when he returns.
  • Make a CD with songs that have special meaning to you and your marriage. That way you can think of each other when you’re listening.
  • Send him a pillow case or (if you’re daring) a piece of lingerie w/ your perfume on it.
  • Be sure to send goody boxes and care packages regularly. Fill them with his favorite treats.
  • Make a little book of word searches or scrambles that contain words of things that remind you of him. Assign a theme to each word search (ie: the first night you met, your first date, your wedding).
  • Send your husband free, personalized “kisses” with a short note. They are fun, romantic, and cute, and it adds a little variety to the conventional e-mail.
  • Think of him on his time. Buy two small travel alarm clocks that display time and date. Keep yours on his time and his on your time (ie: set yours to Iraq time zone and his to Eastern time zone). Then whenever look at the clock you’ll know what time it is where he is and vice-versa.
  • Have a calendar made with pictures of the two of you.
  • Send a “Heart Attack”. Cut out heart shaped pieces of paper and write on them the things you appreciate about him. Place all the hearts in an envelope and send them to him.
  • Have a favorite photograph of the two of you made into a jigsaw puzzle. Send your husband a few pieces with every letter.
  • Send him reminders of back home. If you visit the beach, send some shells and sand in a baggy to him – be sure to tell him how much you missed him being there. Send an autumn leaf to remind him of the tree in your yard and the Fall season. And so forth.
  • Send your husband a personalized set of dog tags. You can have your photo (and your children’s photo), engraved on them so he can wear his family close to his heart.